Need relationship advice. Does anyone have this going on?

I can't even talk to my boyfriend anymore. When he gets home from work i totally understand he wants to just relax but he always wants to be left alone, which is fine too, but i mean he hardly even talks to me the whole night. Like today I went an hour out of my way to bring him lunch to his work, he couldnt talk to me cause he had to work (which is fine too), but then he hardly talked to me when he got home. The problem i had is he told me he's a little bit sexually frustrated cause i dont ...do stuff enough, but its like i just have no motivation to. My only motivation is so he doesnt cheat, and lately i like dont even care. He never talks to me, I NEVER EVER EVER get any sex EVER...(its always me going down on him). We've been dating 7 years and we live together and it just sucks. Can you give me any advice? I just told him i'm sad and im gonna go in the other room lol and he just stayed in his room and doesnt care....he just seems to be caring less and less about me. What should i do here? This is a really long relationship that i dont want to just end, although its been on my mind a lot.Need relationship advice. Does anyone have this going on?
I believe that people now-a-days put to much concertraion on how long they have been with someone. U should realize that it doesnt matter if it has been 2 week, 2 months, 2 years, or even 7 years... If its not working and their is no sign of it getting better then its not working.Need relationship advice. Does anyone have this going on?
Both of you seem to be frustrated with each other and have taken each other for granted. Your relation is too complicated. if you want to continue it then talk with your boyfriend and see his point of view and both of you adjust accordingly. if you have made your mind to end your relation then just go ahead and do it. it will seen difficult. but the longer you hurt yourself by staying in this relation it will hurt more.
well I think he needs a vacantion,and try to not stay in his way and try a day or 2 day to not talk with him maybe he will oberve that something is happening,but if not u will have to talk with him and tell him everything u have in your heart,good luck and be strong in a couple this kind of situation is very offten
Sounds exactly like how my relationship was before it ended. He might just think its not gonna work or something and subconsciuosly distancing himself from you. You deserve better, and considering you said you don't really care care, you should have no problem leaving. Find someone who cares, and is.. lets say, satisfying.
A friend once told me, ';if you imagine someone else with him %26amp; you don't care it's time to end things';. I know 7 yrs is a long time but if you can't talk %26amp; work it out, you need to remember you want to be happy for the rest of your life. Hope this helps.
He hates his job and it is destroying his spirit. He hopes you can give him an escape from his misery at home but U do not seem up to that. The last thing he needs is to deal with everything at work and then come home and deal with your dissatisfaction.


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My best advice is to find a grrl friend you can share your dissatisfaction with and perhaps you and she can lift each other's spirits and deal with the situation until it passes.


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Maybe you need to talk him into finding a different job. Maybe you should make money to help take the pressure off him.


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At any rate, how do the weekends go, I think given two days you should be able to motivate him for sex.
Dear Neglected,





It is not uncommon for a relationship to fall into regularity and lose its fire. It is even more common for the man to lose interest first.





Counseling is usually the best solution to this problem, though it is not uncommon for the man to be hesitant or completely opposed to engaging in that solution. The reason that counseling is so important is that it forces both parties to engage in communication that is lacking in the relationship. In your case, you seem to be making an effort at communicating, but your significant other is lacking.





One do it at home solution is to try to rekindle the fire yourself using a few different methods. One simple, short term solution is trying to take a small trip or vacation together. This gets the couple out of the regular scheme of things and will make communication necessary. You might be able to (which could be used during/after your trip when communication is improved) convince your partner to engage in some new activity. For example, you could take language lessons, scuba, sky diving, tennis, exercising, etc. together. Engaging in physical activities together usually will require communication and even increase the libido, which brings me to my next point.





As for sex, it should not be a chore, though sometimes it turns out that way for men. If it is possible to open the lines of communication, you should discuss each others fantasies or even try new things that seem different to you. There has to be mutual consent however and sympathy for each others desires. Recently, I had a friend of mine tell me that she does a lot of different stuff with her boyfriend. They are very open about what they want and find themselves laughing at times while they have good sex. Yeah, I'm throwing up with jealousy too, but I think there is that potential for all of us!
i was in the SAME situation. We were in college and had no time bc studying or whatever, but he was also being rude by playing games and spending time on other things than me when he was home. Unfortunately, it ended bc i couldnt take being alone, and that is when he decided to change. but it was too late, at least for me, bc i was tired of explaining myself. have u tried to tell him? maybe he doesnt realize it? and u should open yourself in everyway to him- espcly sex bc that is SO important for relationships. once that is gone, everything falls apart, in my experience, so maybe you should spark a light again?
My Mother once told me, '; I gave you live son, you have to make the rest of it work yourself, I only promised you life';





I believe you have to talk this out with him, pick a weekend when work is not part of the problem. I understand a investment in time, but if it is not working and you can't talk, then you can't fix the problem.





as for your sexual problem. If is is tired your the pressure release for him. And this is fair as long as it works both ways too. Like going to a shower together and then to bed a hour or so early on a Friday night and playing for about before you get down to the needs of adults.





good luck


Johnny
I think you should try to do something new. maybe he is bored in this relationship so try to cheer him up.
there's obviously sth wrong with him. he might be depressed. u need to take serious action and talk to a therapist. he might be over this relationship, but before going for the break up option, u'd better make sure he's mentally fine, he may need help.


if his sex drive is affected, (and we consider he's not cheating) then depression is very much of an option.


breaking up is the last option in ur case. so be strong and step fwd to work this out instead of acting passive aggressive.


If he was all fine, then go for break up and saving ur self-steem !
i like all the answers from the girl's point of view but i agree with the one guys, if it's not working, then it's not working. if he wanted it to work, he'd be trying to talk with you. maybe try to talk to him once, maybe mention it a second time, then leave. you're better than that and after seven years, he should know when you're sad or worried or want to talk. maybe after you say something he'll get the hint then and it'll all work out, and maybe he'll say it's not meant to be anymore, help you move and invite you not to come back. you never know until you say something.





good luck tho, in any case.
Sounds to me like he's apathetic and depressed. You're going to have to make him talk to you. Ask him how he feels about you, if he still loves you. You should explain your feelings to him too. If you can't get him to talk, write him a LONG letter and put sneak it into his lunch box. Put it in the same bag as his sandwich (he can't miss it there). I would suggest at the end of the letter you give him some options of what he needs to do if he wants to this to work. All else fails, he needs to see a therapist or if you are friends with one of his buddies, ask him to talk to your boyfriend and see what you can find out.





Wish the best for you!
Your boyfriend doesn't appreciate you the way he maybe did when you guys first started dating. From reading your post, it seems as if you do everything to keep him happy at the expense of your own happiness. If it hasn't already, this will turn into a destructive, unfulfilling relationship. It's hard for me to say this, because I love a good BJ, but don't give him anything until you guys come to an understanding. Obviously, you two are bound because you're living together, but you're not married. So, in order to make progress, and to get things to work for you as well (whatever the outcome may be couple/breakup), you need to speak to him, and express your feelings. You shouldn't be afraid to hold back. Actually, it should be easier for you because you've been together for seven years. Best wishes for your happiness!