I need relationship advice, badly. Please help me?

I have been in a relationship with this boy, Jeff for a year now. We were each others first everything. First serious relationship, first love, we even lost our virginities to each other.


Everything was going SO perfectly for us. We were happy and just amazing together. But the one day,about 3 weeks ago he decided he only wanted to be friends.


At that point, there were only 2 weeks of the summer left and i was going to move into college after those 2 weeks.


For those 2 weeks I was so upset and heart broken


But we were still hanging out A LOT, we were having a ton of fun together but we were still doing things like cuddling and stuff like we were when we were dating.


But he was still ';single'; and i was still ';single';





so anyway, last week i moved to college, but its only 10 minutes away from our town. jeff came up to see me the first day i moved in.


and he has been up almost everyday for my first week there


but i also made a ton of friends and have beeen having such a good time there


so for the past week while i have been at college and he has been coming to see me, we have been doing so many more things


we have been cuddling, holding hands, sleeping together, kissing each other goodnight. he even calls me his girlfriend sometimes.


i have been so confused


i think he is doing this, becuase he sees how much fun i am having there, and that IF i wanted to get over him, i could


because for those 2 weeks before, i was just sitting at home crying over himm


but onve i got to college that changed


so i think he is seeing how he could lose me





we never talked about any of this stuff though


ui never asked him to define what we are doing and he never asked me


we just let it happen


it is obvious to me, and my friends, and people around me, that he still has feelings for me. because why else would he be doing this with me


HE was the one to make all the first moves, he was the one who held my hand first, held me in bed first, kissed me... etc


he did them for the first times since we broke up


it was all him, not me








so last night we were in bed and cuddling and he looked at me and said to me..


';i was thinking about things today, about how we cuddle and sleep together and hold hands and stuff. i know we do all of those things, but i still dont have feelings for you';


and i looked at him and said


';i dont believe you when you say that';





and he just turned away








i dont know whats going on


i dont want to tlak to him about it because i know he is going to try to tell me he has no feelings for me when i KNOW he does


but i dont want to lose him


i dont know





i am really confused


i dont know what i should do


everyoine is telling me to just stop and not see him anymore


but i dont want to do that


ii dont know should ii just give it some time?


i need advice. pleaseI need relationship advice, badly. Please help me?
I'm sorry that you're being strung on by a guy who says he doesn't care anymore. I was in the exact same boat when my high school boyfriend and I started college. He was so jealous about all the fun I was having that he didn't want to let go, but he also wouldn't admit that he still wanted to be with me.





If he says he doesn't want to see any other girls, he still has feelings for you. but if he won't admit that, he is totally not worth it. It's hard to believe once you've shared so much with someone, but you CAN do better.





After I finally left my ex, I held out for a couple of years for someone that I knew would be worth it. I dated a lot but had no relationship until my current one, and I am so glad that I waited until I found him.





In my opinion, you should tell him that if he doesn't care, he shouldn't come see you. Try to make a lot of new friends. You will have so much more fun when you're not being led on, and college is such a great opportunity to start out fresh.I need relationship advice, badly. Please help me?
Some advice, shorten your question.
if it makes you this upset then call it off. It's not worth it!
maybe he is seeing another girl..=D...just tell him bye bye..and find another man..
talk to him about it.


sounds like he has feelings for you


or he doesnt want to be with you,


but he wants you for himself.


understand that?


and thats not fiar for you to keep holding onto him if hes moving on,


and just keeping you from other guys.





maybe he just doesnt want to see you happy,


he seems like he wants you to be chasing him ,


while hes chasing other girls.


i dont know if that makes sense.


but tell him this


';If you dont have feelings for me anymore then its not fair for you to keep doing things with me. If you don't love me anymore then stop doing these things. I stil have feelings for you, but if you don't this isn't fair at all and I need to move on.';





not excatly that but put it in your own words.





hope everything turns out okay for you.
Wow... That was really long........ So props to me for reading it!!! So anyway, back to your issue. Its obvious that you still have feelings for him.. right? So tell him. Say, ';I still have feelings for you'; but tell him that you don't like the fact that he is cuddling with you, and sleeping with you, but then telling you that you guys are not dating.. Sorry, but if some guy is sleeping with you, then you are either having multiple one-night stands, or he is dating you. No other way around it.





I know you don't want to lose him, but you need to let him know that what he's doing is not ok. If he tells you that it is, its not. Let him know that. From what I hear, it sounds like he's taking advantage of you. Especially since you said something along the lines of how he can see you having fun. I'm sure you are more than able to get another boyfriend in college, and now that he sees that he's jealous.





He sounds like a piece of digestive waste to me.
Girl, what are you doing to yourself? Your boyfriend says that to you, and that's your response? I would think that if I said something like that to a woman I've been nailing, I would quickly get a foot to my butt, and get thrown out of her house, post haste. You say you don't want to dump him, but where is your relationship going to be in a few years? No offense, but it sounds like he's playing you for sex. That's all. You know you're going to meet someone who loves you truly, and deeply. Why let your boyfriend get it for free? Tell him to get lost.
aww.. honestly do not waste your time on him!


How confusing.


I think that he's using you in a way mabey trying to REPLACE


some one else with you and thats horrible. You should be the one to draw the line and say


if you don't have feelings for me or love me the way you use to then


why are you doing this to me? Tell him that friends don't kiss on the lips and cuddle in bed... ask him and be straigt. Just ask him, ''why do you kiss me if it doesn't mean anything or you so called don't have feelings for me?''


Dude he is confusing,proabably confused with himself, and he's playing mind games with you.


I think you should just be straight with him, and you shouldn't let him do any of those things with him (even if u want to) because, he was the one to say that you guys should be friends. So treat him like a friend and not a mate.


I have so much more advice but no time to type...


so good luck and I hope things work out between you guys =)



ok me reading this he still loves you because he is seeing you all the time and friends obviously dont do that. He is visiting you becasue he misses you, and you are right he dont wanna looose you again like he already did the first time. Next time you see him, tell him ';do you love me or not, and if you dont, dont see me anymore'; .. He is probably going to say no because he wants to move on with his life, and find someone else, or is just mad that you are in college and is afraid you are going to cheat on him, but again if he says no at that point leave him and move on. You have a whole life to live, and it seems like he is wasting your time right now. But if he says yes say with him. Start over a new leaf right now, if he is not right for you, there will be other guys in the world he would treat you more.
He still cares about you and enjoys being with you BUT since you are gone..even if its 10 minutes he wants 2 things to be accomplished with this ';break up'; I think he wants to be the one that does the controlling of the relationship so if you find someone else he is the one that broke up with you..and...if he does he wont be cheating on you since you are broken up....its basically called Keeping his options open.





He might still care about you but might be worried that you have been together so long and the only one hes been with, that hes missing something.