Relationship advice - cheating and insecurity?

Relationship advice - cheating and insecurity?


I'm an insecure and distrusting person by nature. I have been betrayed many times in the past and this is the reason I'm constantly on my toes and worried something is going to happen. I'm engaged to someone I love very much and pregnant with his child. (Engaged first, pregnancy second) However, this person has betrayed me in the past - not sure if it was cheating? Sexual IMs with my best friend when we were all young and immature. Maybe it counts? Anyway, several years later we are back together (after he cheated on an ex with me, by the way) and I'm worried that he's cheating on me. Maybe I shouldn't have gotten back with him based on his history, but he SWORE to me that things were different now.. and of course I believed him. But then things started changing and I grew suspicious. I wasn't particularly suspicious that he was cheating at first, but I had noticed he isn't nearly as loving and affectionate as he was even 4 months ago. I wondered if my own insecurity was what was pushing him away. So I downloaded a keystroke recorder. I know, it's very wrong. But the worry was bothering me to the point that I was nauseated or couldn't sleep at night. What have I learned? He chats with a few girls (real-life friends) on IM. Harmless at first, but lately it has gotten to the point that it may be crossing the line. He told her she was attractive. She told him if the both of them weren't already attached, she would ';have a thing'; with him. He did not respond to that one, much to my relief. But I know he will continue to talk to her. And I know from experience once things like that are said, it almost always goes farther. I don't know what to do. He says he loves me and would never cheat on me. And now thanks to me not trusting him, I have found some hurtful things in a dishonest way. Should I just ignore it, delete the program, and work on fixing my insecurity/behavior? Or should I confront him and leave since it's obvious that we both have issues that make for an unhealthy relationship? Or is it just ME with the issues, and I'm reading too much into this? Do you think if I can fix myself, he will realize he doesn't needthis attention from the other girls? Either way, I know I need to fix myself before I can be happy with anyone, whether it's him or a future partner. I just don't know what to do... I'm lost and hurt and so confused. And not to mention PREGNANT! I want to be able to work things out before I destroy us. Any advice will be appreciated, even the brutally honest.Relationship advice - cheating and insecurity?
What you need to do is try to calm down. Your going through a lot. You need to do whats best for yourself, Follow your heart. I know you'll do the right thing. You can fix this.





I'm going through a very hard time as well. If you or ANYONE can help me with an answer, Ill give you 10 points as well. PLEASE!





http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgyU4kBX43Wx.3mdIRwT9Wzsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20090507172334AAFRtJ3Relationship advice - cheating and insecurity?
trust is something that holds a relationship together


if you dont have that thsi might not work


and if he was cheating would you really want a cheater as the kids father?


This might sound unhelpful but really the only way to clear things up is to taaaalk to himm


confront him and straighten things out
Alot of times when a girl is pregnant things tend to bother more than they would otherwise due to hormones..This could be some of what is going on but not all..While the pregnancy is making things worse I think you should my go speak with a counselor before getting married..Someone to help you decide if your jealousy issues are something you can work through otherwise you may find yourself married with a baby and very unhappy with your life..