Serious relationship advice/opinion?

Hi firstly i would like to thank in advance responses received and the time taken to read my situation.





I have been with my current partner/gf for six years. We are both are similar ages early 20's and are both living with parents.





Through the times we have shared we have had our ups and downs as every usual relationship. Over recent years I have became more distant towards her not showing as much attention or affection to her as i once did and generally lacking excitement towards the relationship. Is this normal?





We have never been as sexual active as i would have liked but that to has gone sour completely with myself having sexual thoughts of other women and desires towards others. When i mean none sexual active i don't mean once/twice a week i mean very rare more months. That said i was her first and i would feel guilty of her believing it was ';worth nothing';.





I find it difficult to speak about how i feel and do not have any intentions of ending the relationship but at times i feel that the relationship has come to an end. I love her but i am not in love with her.





We are going on holiday in two months and she is really looking forward to the break, whilst i am looking forward to the break im not so keen on it being with her with us most likely arguing all holiday. I am disappointed in myself as i am unable to search my inner self to determine how i feel when i am usual in control of my feelings and understand exactly how i feel.Serious relationship advice/opinion?
Wow I am sorry for your situation for sure. I would say its time you make a clean and kind break from her. When your young and you have spent most of your dating life with one person, especially one you don't have the 'fire' for anymore, your cheating yourself (and her) out of the happiness you deserve.





It sounds to me like your still with her because she is 'comfortable' and you will feel guilty if you break up and that is not a reason to be with another person.





Do the right thing and let her go.. so both of you can find someone who you are 'in love' with.Serious relationship advice/opinion?
Gareth, six years a long time. It is normal for relationships to kind of fizzle out, but not in a bad way. It's the same for married couples, only they are bound by matrimonial vows to each other, not to mention children. Don't feel bad about it. It just sounds as if you both have ';grown apart'; from each other. It happens. I think you both need to come to a mutual understanding within your relationship. Talk about exactly how you are feeling and what you can do about it, especially if you have no intentions of ending the relationship. I think you do. You are still young, Gareth. Damn! Give yourself a chance to date other women. Don't stifle yourself. That's why you have feelings of disappointment in yourself. You're only trapping yourself when you're really not even happy or satisfied in the relationship. Why prolong that?? You said it yourself, you love her, but you are not IN love with her. There you go! Don't fool yourself, you need to break it off. Think really hard about what you want to do about the relationship. Do you REALLY want to stay in it? Is it worth it? Do I love her? Does she love me? If you have more negative answers than positive, then the time has come to go your separate ways, sad as it may seem. You are unhappy, Gareth, and that's unhealthy. You need to be happy. Don't prolong her agony and stay in the relationship just for the hell of it. It's a cruel thing to do somebody. If you still feel you want to stay in the relationship. You need to sit down with her and talk to her about EVERYTHING and how you feel. Then, you need to come to a mutual understanding about how you both are gonna deal with and try to resolve the differences or whatever that is bothering you so much. Get it out, don't hold that kind of stuff in. It's better to be honest with yourself. If you stay, but you don't love her, that being dishonest to you and to her and you both are missing out chances for happiness. Take a stand. Think about what you wanna do, talk about it, come to an understanding, and make sure you both follow through on it. Remember, it's a team effort and requires both of your input and efforts. Don't drag out your unhappiness, it's not cool. But, think about it, seriously. Don't make any hasty decisions. Think everything through before you decide, okay? You'll be okay. Don't be disappointed in yourself because it's NOT your fault. Understand that. That's part of having a relationship. You are finding out about whether this person is suitable for you or not to spend your life with. So, it turns out it isn't?? The world is not gonna crumble. Life will go on and you'll meet tons of other beautiful women waiting for you out there. Be strong, take action, and remedy it. Things in life won't always go the way you want it. Take care and good luck, sweetie. Aloha!